Fantasy, Prince Charming, Disappointment

I used to have this fantasy-- I used to picture walking down the isle in my dream dress in a beautiful church and seeing my prince charming waiting at the end with stars in his eyes, maybe even crying... I imaged it being the perfect moment, beautiful and blissful. When I get to the end of the isle, my (step)dad can barely control himself as he gives me away. Everything would be magic. Isn't that what just about every girl wants in their wedding?

Well now I have come to the realization that Prince Charming does NOT exist. Don't get me wrong, I love my Jonathan dearly; I wouldn't trade him for anything. Like any other couple, though, we have our ups and downs. No one will ever have the "perfect relationship." It's a dream. I have the [ir?]rational fear that nothing is going to go right at our wedding.

Let's start with the basics. Stars in his eyes? Doubtful. I'm not that special. I mean he says that he will be so happy at our wedding, but I just can't picture it :-/ Tears?-- now that is definitely not going to happen. Maybe this is just my clinical depression speaking that makes me expect the worst. Maybe I am being completely irrational! What do you think? Next, my step dad crying... Well he's just not that type of person.

Anyway, I can only hope that things turn out exactly as I'm NOT expecting, because this is supposed to be the most joyous time of my life.

Feeling Beautiful

So, I bought my dress on Saturday. I had a great time with my bridesmaids in Spokane. We picked out and paid for my dress (it will be in sometime in April) and we picked out the bridesmaids dresses which I was going to buy BUT I hit my credit limit. Boohoo!

It felt nice trying on my dream dress. Every time I went on the David's Bridal website, I drooled over this dress. It was my dream to have this dress. I tried it on in a few sizes too big, so the woman helping me had to pin it back. I fell in love with it instantly.

There was another dress that I was strongly considering, but since I am having a Catholic wedding, I can't have a strapless dress which means I would have also had to buy something to cover my shoulders. The only problem with that is that the dress was already right at my budget. Because of this, and the fact that it was beautiful, I went with the other dress. I am very satisfied with my choice.

Being a plus-sized bride, I am self conscious constantly; I felt like I had never felt before in this dress. This dress called out my name when I first laid eyes on it. Since I tried it on a few sizes too big, I had to guess that my size was the same as in the other dresses I tried on. Hopefully I'm right! If it does turn out to be a little small, luckily I CAN lose weight between April and October. I will be a beautiful blushing bride. :-)

Long Lists of People

Names. Lots and lots of names. Names galore! We have been working on our list of people to send save the dates and invitations to. We ordered 150 cards (with free envelopes, yay!), and I am getting ready to fill a bunch out now. I am actually going to be working on that as soon as I am done posting this. So far we only have 58 addresses, but we're going to be giving some to people rather than sending in the mail, so there will be over a hundred I'm sure, once we've sent and handed everyone their cards. Wow, that was a long sentence! The save the date cards are just as cute as they were in the picture, so I am pretty satisfied.

On another note, I am getting geared up for this weekend! Getting a chance to spend some time with my girls and look at pretty dresses, then spending the night with a friend. I haven't had a "sleepover" in years! We're going to go look at dresses, get some panda express for lunch or dinner, and make ABSOLUTE SURE to stop by a Krispy Kreme donut store!

Tell me, how excited were you girls when you went dress shopping for the first time? If you haven't gone yet or if you're not even engaged yet, how excited do you anticipate being when your time comes? Trust me, it will live up to it's expectations, and then some.

I will probably see you all again after the weekend! Have fun blogging :-)

Music

So I know this isn't wedding related, buuut I want to bring this up anyway. I am really self conscious. I feel like I am not talented. Of course, my amazing fiance disagrees! I love to sing, and some people tell me I'm good but I'm not so sure. I was thinking of posting a video on YouTube and seeing if other people agree or disagree with my friends. What do you guys think of this idea? I'm worried that if people say I'm no good that my confidence will be shot to hell, but on the other hand it might boost my confidence a lot. Hmm, decisions decisions!

Back to Dresses

A lot of people have negative things to say about David's Bridal and a lot of people have positive things to say about them. I, for one, am one to say positive things for them. At least SOME of their stuff is a pretty good price, and the one I went to gave me phenomenal customer service. I like it so much that I'm going back!

I am going with two of my bridesmaids over to Spokane, WA to go back to David's Bridal. I am excited to go try on more dresses, and I have style numbers written down to ask if I can try on. I am also pretty thrilled (as are my bridesmaids) to pick out bridesmaids dresses while we're there! My girls definitely lean toward their feminine sides, which means they just love dresses. This will be fun.

Last time I went to David's Bridal in Spokane, I showed up without an appointment on a Friday afternoon and they still got me in to try stuff on. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to show up unannounced after a long drive... Probably should have called. Anyway, I got treated so well there. Best of all, despite being an overweight bride, I didn't feel fat at all. The woman helping me with everything was a size six and she still went so out of her way to make me feel beautiful, and she succeeded. I found my dream dress and was determined to get it, but as I found out (mentioned in my last post), I can't wear a strapless dress. I am going to try it back on and see about maybe wearing a bolero with it, as well as trying on more dresses hopefully. My budget got bumped up to $600, so maybe I can try on either my first or second choice dream dresses. Well, I guess I can't say first or second; I love them both so much!

So, I am going back next Saturday, doing my first long car drive (I'm used to in town driving or having other people drive me out of town D:) so I am nervous. It will go amazingly, and I can't wait, long car ride or not. Wish me luck!

Summary Of It All

We talked to our priest today, and we learned a lot of things.

First off, I can't wear a strapless dress. That's it. I have to find a bolero to wear with the dress I picked out or choose a different dress. That sucks, because I love the dress I found, just the way it is. I will live, though. No one died from covering their shoulders in a church. It's a good thing I asked the priest before I forgot!

Next, we talked about the things we need to do for marriage prep in my church. We need to use a number 2 pencil (so the priest joked) to do a long "test" basically asking us questions about each other and stuff like that. He said it will take an hour and a half. Whoa, that's a while! We're going back to the church on Thursday morning to get set up with that.

Another requirement to get married in my diocese is going to this retreat called "Engaged Encounter." It's about $300 for the weekend, which is pricey, but everyone I've heard from that's gone to it says that it was amazing and that they're glad that they went. I guess it's a good thing it's a requirement, because I probably wouldn't end up going otherwise. I'm sure it will be very good for us as a couple!

We talked to the church secretary about fees and such at the church. It will be $200 to rent the church for the ceremony, $200 for the priest/donation to the church, and $450 to use their side building for the reception. That's a bit more than I was expecting... Oh well, we'll move some numbers around I guess. It's not like we have any other choice.

I got my money today! I know that student grants are supposed to go toward living expenses, but at the moment I don't pay for living expenses and my school is 100% covered, so I guess I have a little extra money... Cha-ching! I can hear that dress just calling my name. And I would even have some money left over! Handy dandy.

On another note, I ordered the save the date cards last night, that I posted a photo of the other day. It was a good price, but they failed to mention the $20 shipping charge, which I couldn't downgrade from... It was still good, so oh well, I can deal with it. I also ordered the red pocket folds that I mentioned in a previous post for the invitations. 150 of everything! We will be set for sure.

So, that was our day... Well, last night too. We're getting there, slowly but surely!

Meeting With The Priest

Today I called my priest back, and guess what! He called back an hour later! The last message I left must have gotten lost in cyber space, I suppose.

It's OFFICIAL! The church is now reserved on October 26th at 2 PM for our wedding. I am so exciting. When things happen officially it all seems to much more real. It seems so close but so far away! Almost 10 months before the wedding, and there is still sooo much to do and so little time.

We're meeting with our priest on Tuesday at 2 PM for premarital "counseling", I guess. I'm not sure what to expect, so I guess we'll just have to wait and see. I am so nervous, because I don't go to church as often as I would like to claim, so talking to the priest will be a little weird. I barely know the priest when he's already been at our parish for almost a year, I think. It doesn't help that he's a very awkward and nervous guy, which is gonna make it even more nerve-wracking to me. I wonder how many times we'll have to meet with him...

On another note, we started a FB event where people can RSVP to the wedding. Don't worry, we're still going to send out save the dates and formal invitations, but this way we can get a closer idea of how many people we might be expecting. It won't be 100% accurate, though, since there are people we are inviting without Facebook accounts, or even computers! We've got 20 people who have said yes on the RSVP on FB and 9 maybes, SO FAR. We invited 108 people total, I think, but a lot of those people will be coming together if they do in fact come.

Anyway, I will stop using your free time by making you read my mind mush and let you go. Happy blogging!

Save The Date Cards

We were originally planning on just sending out invitations six months out and skipping save the date cards, but things got in the way of that. Apparently, some of my extended family needs more warning than that, so we're back to having to do save the dates. I've been looking at some, and they are almost as expensive as the invitations themselves! Yeesh, so we're going to have to budget with them both to not go over too much by doing a set of each rather than just invites. Here are the ones I was looking at, let me know what you think.

They're simple and I think rather nice. Guess what-- it's only $60 for a hundred of them! That's such a good deal, these days. The key is to look and look and then look some more until you find good deals (while still using reputable sources.) 

We're planning on sending out around 100 invites and save the dates, so good deals are a good thing to look out for. It's especially good when you're planning a wedding on a tight budget like we are. We need to buy the cards and send them out ASAP now! As soon as I get some money ;-)

I hope all of you people planning weddings are working as hard to make your day special as I am!

<3

Stay-cation?

For all of you who don't know what a stay-cation is, it is a stay at home vacation. My fiance and I have been talking about just how expensive honeymoons are. We were thinking of so many places, then narrowed it down to Puerto Rico. Everything there looked perfect and we were excited about the prospect of going somewhere like that. Nothing was set in stone... Which turned out to be good. It is really a good thing we didn't get our hopes up too high because it got to be time to get our heads out of the clouds. We're on a budget. I don't have a job, his isn't great paying and we are both basically surviving on school grants.

Tonight we have tossed around a few ideas-- staying home and saving the money for an even better vacation at a later time, doing a weekend thing not too far out of town, or maybe even going to this place (I don't remember the details) that his parents really wanted to go to with us. That last one doesn't sound too terribly romantic, but oh well. As long as we're not sharing a room with them, I'm good!

I want to go somewhere with a spa. No matter what we do or where we go, I would love to get a couple's massage with him. It can be romantic, relaxing, and maybe get someone in the mood? Just kidding about that last part.

Another place I'd be interested in going is maybe renting a cabin for a few days and go camping. Toasting marshmallows by a fire, fishing during the day... Maybe not the most romantic of things, but we both love camping and fishing. It would be fun and outdoorsy. What would you think of something like that?

Something you have to ask yourself when planning a honeymoon is: "What can I do that will be fun and within my means?" Do NOT get your hopes up and daydream about what you COULD do, just think about what you CAN do. You will enjoy yourself a lot more if you don't keep thinking you wish you could have done something better or gone somewhere nicer. Doing that will only take away from what is supposed to be a very special time in your life. Money can't buy memories, after all!

Talking To The Officiant

Just the week after we got engaged, we called the priest at my church to find out about going to premarital counseling, which I believe it a requirement for marriage at my church. That was about two months ago! No call back yet! I've been thinking about calling again and leaving ANOTHER message, but on the other hand, if he hasn't called back then he must be pretty busy...

My sister had this same problem with the same priest-- he did call back eventually though. He called back a few months later, I believe. He doesn't just have people leave messages with the church secretary anymore, since there was confusion once, so now he takes his own messages. It doesn't seem to be working.

To call or not to call, that is the question.

Who are you going to have marry you? Have you contacted him/her yet? In case you run into problems, it would be good to contact him/her as soon as possible. You never know when someone might not get the message or something else might happen. Don't be like me-- make sure you keep trying and keep trying until you make absolute sure that they are going to be able to and willing to do it!

Well, here's the end of a short post. Until next time, friends.

What To Walk Down The Isle In

Shoes. Everyone loves shoes, right? Shoes come in so many different shapes and sizes, colors and brands. One shoe can tell so much about a person. Today's question: describe the perfect shoe for your wedding day. Okay, so that's not really a question, but do it anyway. Just picture yourself wearing your dress standing in front of a closet of a million different shoes. Would you go for the flat ones or the high heels? Would you go for white or bright red? Do you want the ones with big bows on the toes? Sandals or dress shoes? There are too many decisions to make when it comes to deciding on what pair of shoes to pick.

Some women like to choose something with a lot of color. It can be bold, edgy, sexy, or whatever you want it to be. Do you choose a color that reflects upon your personality or do you choose something to match the bridesmaid dresses? I like a lot of color in weddings, even though it's supposed to be full of white and all that fun stuff. Admittedly, I would probably go with simple white shoes, though. I love color, but I am a simple person without too much spunk. I just don't think that bright shoes like some women wear would look like ME. I definitely wouldn't bash on anyone who did choose to wear some color on their feet when the rest of them is dressed in all white.

A lot of people might consider white shoes to be boring and lack any personality to them. In some cases, that might be true. Think of it this way-- when you see cute shoes, is it because of the style or is it the color? If it's the color, then you are welcome to disregard this whole thing. I like shoes for how they are designed. I like tall shoes and I like short shoes. I like some skinny shoes and some bulky ones. I like sandals and sneakers too. High heels? Sure. Flats, definitely. There are so many different characteristics to shoes that you shouldn't make a big decision on how ANY part of you is dressed on your wedding day based on one little thing like color.

These days, you can never be a bride without at least five or ten people noticing your feet. Your shoes, though they may not be as important as your dress, still need to be considered. All I am saying is, don't throw any old rags of leather onto your feet and call it good!

Shoes to match your dress is a perfect excuse to shop, shop, SHOP!
So what are you still doing here?

Groom's Cakes

This is such an open subject. What really is a groom's cake? To some people, it is a cake that a bride gives to the groom as a gift at the rehearsal dinner or at the wedding reception. To other people, though, it is merely a second cake served at the wedding in the event of there not being enough of the "wedding cake."

I always grew up believing that a groom's cake was the latter of the two above mentioned things. Now that I have learned about the cake being a gift to the groom from the bride, I kinda think that it basically being the "spare cake" is tacky and lame.

I love the idea of a groom's cake. The bride gets to present something [tasty] to her husband-to-be in the form of something that reflects upon his interests. A woman can use this as a way of saying, "I know who you are and what you like; I can't wait to marry you." One thing that I love about the whole thing is that you can make it anything you want. Or anything he would want, rather. My fiancé works in a home improvement store and LOVES to work with his hands, so I am going to order a cake in the shape of a tool box with tools scattered across the top. This is a chance for a bride to get super creative.

As stated before, a groom's cake can be presented at either the rehearsal dinner OR at the wedding reception. What I plan on doing is having it at the rehearsal dinner because the rehearsal dinner is so much more personal. I mean, sure, at the wedding reception you two will be newlyweds, but it's not as intimate. At the [traditional] rehearsal dinner, only immediate family and the wedding party will be there. It is so much more personal. A wedding reception is almost as much for the guests as it is for the bride and groom, so why give such an intimate gift there? I think that the groom's cake is for the groom, not for everyone else, which is why I think giving it to him with just a few family and friends there would be best.

One thing that is slightly aggravating about the whole thing though, is my wondering, "why IS there even a groom's cake?" It's not like there is a bride's cake. The "wedding cake" is for both of the happy couple, so why is there one just for the groom? Not that I think there is anything wrong with it, of course, but I wonder how the whole idea got started.

Since many weddings don't have big enough wedding cakes to feel all of their guests, for whatever reasons (too many guests, small cake, too expensive, etc.), it is good to have a spare cake. Why not just get a big fancy sheet cake? If you get a big enough one, it alone could feed all of the guests. Just please, don't let a cheap $25 Wal*Mart cake be your cake that you give to your new husband. That is just beyond tacky.

So there you have it, folks; groom's cakes are a perfect way out of giving your husband a real wedding gift!
...
Just kidding.