My New Mantra

I had a meltdown today. The stress had just piled up on me so much and I finally erupted. Money is very tight and things are getting difficult, this month especially. I'm realizing that the wedding is getting to be very close and we have no place to live yet! Planning a wedding is all fun and games-- until it isn't. My mom said I had a few options of what I could do: Option 1. We cut the guest list and have the reception somewhere cheaper or have no reception at all. Option 2. We make sacrifices and not buy the rings we picked out or get the apartments we wanted. Option 3. Push back the wedding date.

Holy moly, that third option is scary. What bride gets to counting down the days and then realizes they might have to wait several more months, if not longer, and is happy about it? Well, not this one. I will do ANYTHING I can to avoid pushing back the date. I've worked too hard for it. What I am thinking is that maybe we have a family-only no-host reception at a restaurant. I know it's kinda tacky, but my family knows my situation and that I can't afford to pay for that much food. Maybe no reception at all. If we did that, we'd get our $500 back; that would be nice...

Anyway, my father has been telling me four words that every engaged/married couple needs to have memorized to be happy and make it paycheck to paycheck: "We can't afford it." He tells me to repeat it over and over to myself and make it my mantra. He says it doesn't matter if I get the slightly nicer ring, as long as I am walking out of that day with a good husband. He's right, I will have an amazing husband.

Myself and the bridesmaids made our first big money saver: changing their dresses. We were already going to go with some FAIRLY inexpensive ones, but it was just too much considering the urgency of needing to order them. I will end up paying a little less for all three than I was going to pay for each. Well, that will help bring stress levels down drastically!

Anyway, my meltdown has ended and I seem to be somewhat rational again. Now I am going to go to bed and dream for a few hours that everything might be perfect someday.

To anyone that actually reads this, goodnight.