I used to have this fantasy-- I used to picture walking down the isle in my dream dress in a beautiful church and seeing my prince charming waiting at the end with stars in his eyes, maybe even crying... I imaged it being the perfect moment, beautiful and blissful. When I get to the end of the isle, my (step)dad can barely control himself as he gives me away. Everything would be magic. Isn't that what just about every girl wants in their wedding?
Well now I have come to the realization that Prince Charming does NOT exist. Don't get me wrong, I love my Jonathan dearly; I wouldn't trade him for anything. Like any other couple, though, we have our ups and downs. No one will ever have the "perfect relationship." It's a dream. I have the [ir?]rational fear that nothing is going to go right at our wedding.
Let's start with the basics. Stars in his eyes? Doubtful. I'm not that special. I mean he says that he will be so happy at our wedding, but I just can't picture it :-/ Tears?-- now that is definitely not going to happen. Maybe this is just my clinical depression speaking that makes me expect the worst. Maybe I am being completely irrational! What do you think? Next, my step dad crying... Well he's just not that type of person.
Anyway, I can only hope that things turn out exactly as I'm NOT expecting, because this is supposed to be the most joyous time of my life.
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